What Some People Say

Dear Rob

Figured you’d enjoy this
You’re motley like me

Getting my near worthless 1976 BMW 2002 fixed at the AutoHaus
I was sitting in the waiting room going over my Yiddish vocab
When the owner Geoff Schuler appeared

He had been a couple years ahead of me in high school
He’s doing well for himself in this shop
He drove a spif new 7-series himself

Geoff said in semi-exasperation as he headed toward the garage
“Geez those Jews will squeeze every dime
Out of you that they can”

When I didn’t offer an affirming comment in return
He popped his head back in the waiting room
With a quizzical look on his face

“Geoff, my father’s Jewish”
And he blushed: “I thought you were German”
As he started to back pedal I said:

“Even though my Beemer is a worn-out piece of shit
You probably don’t want to alienate a promising market niche
You ever hear that story about the Jewish doctor

His immigrant father swore off ever buying anything German
So the doc told his father—lied to him—that his new BMW stood for
British Motor Works

The Ultimate Driving Machine
Appeals to lots of different people
Including, believe it or not, Jews”


–work-in-progress, Our Heroic and Ceaseless 24/7 Struggle against Tsuris

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